


Waking Up

by SlyFan



Series: Slys Life [5]
Category: DRAMAtical Murder (Visual Novel), DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Multi, Somnophilia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-06-04
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:40:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 19,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24292204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SlyFan/pseuds/SlyFan
Summary: Sly wakes up, set somewhere between Noiz leaving and Noiz coming back after being scrapped. He's gonna. Do what he wants.Slys POV. You don't have to read the rest of the series to understand.
Relationships: Mizuki/Sly Blue (DRAMAtical Murder), Sly Blue/Trip/Virus
Series: Slys Life [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1793200
Kudos: 17





	1. Finally

**Author's Note:**

> My current title is just because AO3 requires a title. I don't like it much. Same for the chapter names. The somno tag is there for some stuff in chapter 4. If you're here for it as a kink you'll be disappointed. If you're squicked by it then beware but it isn't really somno I just felt like I should give warning.

You wake up for the first time in absolutely ages, immediately peering around the room. Still your room, just you there. Well. Ren too. It doesn’t take you more than a second to decide that there’s not a way in hell he’s waking up today. You’re just not fucking dealing with him. You don’t know what you’re doing today, but he’s staying right here. You’re not putting up with that judgement.

He’d be mad anyway. Demand to know why you’re here. You couldn’t even answer that if you wanted. You hadn’t done anything. From what you can feel of Aoba, he certainly hadn’t wanted to do this. He’s trying his best to force himself forward, but you can feel that at least today, you’re too strong for him. You aren’t one to question a good thing.

How long has it actually been? You suppose it doesn’t really matter, but you’re still a little curious. You’ve been watching, whilst he does everything, but it reaches a point where things really blend together.

You haven’t been out since the last time you rhymed, and he wouldn’t even give you the chance to do that properly. You’d won, but you hadn’t even got to play properly.

And then of course, you had the pleasure of watching as Aoba ruined everything.

And wow did he do it spectacularly.

First, Mizuki. He’d never known Mizuki as well as you did, and it fucking showed. He blindly believed Mizuki was fine, despite how you tried to make sure he knew he wasn’t. Koujaku tried. Neither of them cared enough. You couldn’t talk to him though. You honestly tired yourself out, trying to force yourself forward to see him, and failing every time.

And when Aoba, the moron that he is, tried to scrap Mizuki, you just had to watch. You couldn’t even try to take over, even though you knew that you would get it right where he just didn’t know how. He should have let you. You like Mizuki, you wouldn’t have fucked him up this bad.

You’re going to go see him. You want some fun today, and you’ll have it, but you want to see Mizuki first. Mizuki is fun. He should be. You don’t know if he is now. You haven’t been watching whilst Aoba has visited him. Not the last few times. Not since he forgave him, so fucking easily.

It was such a Mizuki thing to do, but it still frustrated you. Of course he wasn’t going to stay mad at Aoba. So you’re mad at Aoba for him. And mad at him for not being.

None of your old clothes fit you, so you are stuck in the awful clothes that Aoba chooses to wear. You lose the jacket at least, so that you don’t look fucking terrible, and immediately start off walking towards the hospital. It won’t take you long, or at the very least it shouldn’t. You don’t walk as horribly slowly as Aoba does.

Honestly? You’re kind of itching for a fight. Walking along, past some ribsters and one rhyme match as you go. You didn’t bring Ren, and you bet he would be a nightmare if you tried to force him into a Rhyme match anyway.

You could use someone elses allmate. You prefer not to, but you’ve done it before. More just for the novelty of it than it actually being a good idea, or, as now, because you wanted to Rhyme and knew Ren just wouldn’t let you. It makes it more difficult, you get injured easier, struggle more to win, but it’s a challenge. And it still gives you what you want. Even if it’s just less satisfying without Ren by your side.

You’ll fight later. Definitely. For now, you need to figure out what you should say to Mizuki. Quickly, preferably, because now that you’ve finally reached the hospital, you’ve not got a whole lot of time left before you reach his room. It really depends what he’s like, you suppose. You hope he’s himself, not the same, dull version you saw when Aoba first visited.

When you walk in he’s asleep. He actually looks peaceful, and you know he’s been having issues sleeping. Maybe it’s better now. Maybe he should be waking up. But even you can’t justify that. He won’t be any fun if you wake him up, and you know reasonably that he clearly should be resting.

You sigh, grabbing some paper from the side of his bed, and immediately scribbling onto it that you want him to call you when he wakes up. He doesn’t check his coil, so you know this is your best bet. Other than waking him up right this second. Which is unappealing. He might get mad, but he wouldn’t actually fight you. And that would just be annoying for both of you.


	2. Find

So you leave, checking in your coil and frowning. You knew the assholes had wiped Aoba’s memory, but did they seriously fucking delete their contact information too? Or did Aoba delete it? Either way, what a pain. You aren’t even sure where to find them, honestly. They’re yakuza now. Or at least they were. You don’t know if they still are. And that doesn’t help with where they are.

It’s so early you half bet they’re still asleep. Do they sleep, really? You know they’re always up stupidly late, but whether they sleep in is a mystery you’ve never cared to explore. Logically, of course they do. So going to the apartment you know they share really does seem like your best bet.

The chances they still live there after what’s probably…. 4-ish years? If you had to guess. Not exactly high. The amount of time it’s going to take you to get there? Way too fucking high. Also high though? The chances that the two of them will give you exactly what you need. You know they will. You wouldn’t be putting the effort in to walk to their place if they weren’t going to give you exactly what you want.

It’s all the way, just on the edge of platinum jail. So far, and you need something to focus on whilst you walk, so you think more on everything that Aoba fucked up.

This one, you know he thinks was him doing a good job, but you really don’t agree. The brat he scrapped. Sure, he didn’t fuck that one up. But he did make him boring. He seemed like he was fun, you practically begged Aoba for a turn with him, and then Aoba destroyed the fun in him, made him ‘normal’ again. Sure, maybe he was happy about it. But you could have had fun with him. And instead, Aoba fixed him, and he fucking ran away. That’s what happens when you decide to care about someone. Moron.

(Not that you could have guessed, after all that time Aoba spent visiting him in the hospital. He’d seemed pretty fucking enamoured with him. You didn’t really know why he’d run, but you knew it proved your point, and that was the important part, really.)

Koujaku, well there he fucked up just by not realising. If you went and offered to suck Koujaku’s dick right now, you had no doubt he’d say yes. You guess Aoba must just not actually be interested in him, honestly. Because if he was interested, then he would have figured that out by now. Maybe he was still pining on Noiz. Who’d been in his life for…. What? All of one month? Maybe two. You couldn’t understand him.

Mink? You thought Mink might have been fun. Having to save Aoba from his team? Not so much. But. Him, himself. He could have been. You wanted so badly to see what he would do to you. He could destroy you. You felt sure of it. To be fair to Aoba, he probably didn’t fuck that one up. Maybe you would have had a bit of fun with Mink, but for himself? He was a fucking dangerous guy. It was probably for the best he didn’t stick around anymore.

Yeah, his biggest fuck ups are definitely Mizuki, Noiz and Koujaku. In that order. Koujaku doesn’t bother you though, and Noiz you don’t care too much. He could have been fun to play with, but that was all really. You’re still just mad about Mizuki.

And you want someone to beat that out of you. So when you finally reach the apartment that may or may not still be theirs, you just walk straight in. Idiots don’t even have their door locked. You assume that means they’re awake. Or just careless.

Eyes are on you immediately when you walk in, and you grin at the pair. Trip is clearly looking for guidance from Virus on what the fuck he’s meant to say, and you can’t help laughing at that. They really just haven’t changed.

“Are you two just going to stare then?” You ask, hands in your pockets. Hersha and Welter aren’t here. They must be somewhere, but they’re not in this room, and the fact that everything you want isn’t readily available is enough to frustrate you. Trip comments something about how you’ve surprised them, and you don’t really care to hear it. If he could be a little more interesting that’d be great.

“Go get Hersha and Welter. I don’t care which one you give me, but I’m fighting one of you.”


	3. Fans

Hersha and Welter are weird. They’re weird to be around, they’re weird to fight with, you’re half sure that they were given no personality at all, but you can’t be sure, because they both seem to have that glint of intelligence that isn’t entirely animalistic. You can honestly see why Virus and Trip don’t bring them around in public. Well. That and their size.

They’re both confident around them, obviously. You used to be completely confident with them, but it’s been a while since you last saw them. You half expect them to have forgotten you.

But when Trip heads to both their bedrooms, and returns with Hersha round his neck, and Welter at his feet, you feel a lot more easy.

Nothing about these two should put you at ease.  
You know that. You’re not fucking dumb.  
You know that they are incredibly dangerous guys.  
But they’ve never done anything to you that you haven’t asked them to, and they have always done pretty much anything that you have asked them to.  
After all, they’re your ‘biggest fans’.

Nothing about them should put you at ease, but how stupid Trip looks, nowhere near as good at handling Hersha as Virus is, and how Hersha immediately reaches out to peer at you, and you swear he looks you in the eyes?  
It really does help in a way you know it really shouldn’t. 

You bend down, reach a hand out to pet through Welters mane, and look up at Virus.

“Your choice. Who’s playing? I could always fight both of you.” Whilst you wait for an answer you tap through some options on your coil. Off to a file dump, you grab a driveby you used to use when you were younger. It’s old, but you’ll be fucked if you believe Toue ever actually put any additional work into this shit. 

“Don’t you think it’s a bit rude to just assume we want to play with you, Aoba-san?”

“Don’t you think it’s a bit rude to waste my time like you don’t? Trip already got us Hersha and Welter, now tell me who’s playing.”

“You must have a preference.” Virus says, standing up and walking over to Trip to take Hersha from him. You’ve never seen a normal snake, but the speed and ease with which he moves can’t be normal.

“We have no interest in playing with you if you won’t even be honest with us about what you want.” He continues, and Trip nods a little in agreement, adding on, “Me or Virus Aoba?”

Honestly? You hate them. You really, really, completely and truly, could not fucking care less. 

If they didn’t refuse to play with each other’s allmates, it would be an easy choice, but you’re already at an advantage by virtue of being you, so they always want their own allmates. 

Meaning that you can’t have both your preference to play with Hersha, with the more balanced moves, instead of the constant offense, and your preference to fight Virus, purely because he’s just more skilled. It’s an annoying fact of playing with these two, but one you’ve grown used to. 

“Give me Welter.” You answer, after a minute where it becomes very clear that neither of them are going to pick for you. He clearly understands, immediately going to your heels, and you smile a little. Maybe an allmate without a personality would be easier to deal with. You don’t have that chance though, really.

“Ah. Thought so.” Virus says, and you swear you should really just punch him in the face. It wouldn’t solve any of your problems at all, but it would get that smile off of it, so it would probably be worth it.  
He wouldn’t fight you if you did that though. The one time you did punch Trip without some warning first, they had actually kicked you out. With some sort of snide comment about learning how to behave when you’re a guest. You don’t think it actually upset either of them, and you swear Trip was trying his best not to laugh at you, but you haven’t done it again since.

Instead of punching Virus, you go to sit on the couch where they both were a minute ago, and Virus settles on the other side. With Usui, Rhyme battles are far more monitored. With drive-bys? Well. It’s your own issue if you fall unconscious onto concrete. So settling onto the sofa first is definitely a good idea.  
Trip sits himself between you two. He’ll probably just watch something on the TV, you assume. You don’t really care, honestly.

You initiate the drive-by, with Welter as your allmate for it, and with Virus being dragged in with you, excited to see the inside of your personal field again.


	4. Fight

You nearly die laughing the moment you enter the field. You really, truly, can’t help it. He’s wearing that ugly green tie, with the jumper that has all the holes in as if it’s some kind of fashion, and he looks a little confused for a second too, which only makes you laugh more, because confused is not a common sight on Virus’s face.

He looks down at himself, and suddenly seems to understand, looking back up at you. “Well. You know Trip and I stopped playing before you did.”

“And you haven’t changed your online form since?” There was nothing else he would use an online form for, but it was still funny to think it was something he’d just completely overlooked.  
Oh you really wanted to fight Trip now. It would just be so much sweeter if Trip had thought to change it and Virus hadn’t. Even if he hadn’t, you would get to see him looking this dumb too.  
Basically, this whole thing was the best idea, purely for this sight. You’re a genius.

You think Virus mumbles something whilst you’re still laughing at him, and then suddenly you see Hersha’s online form approaching and have to dodge. Asshole.

“All talk Sly!” He calls across the field to you, and you don’t know if it’s better or worse, him taunting instead of being put together. It’s good to be back in a fight, and it’s good to know that even though he surprised you, Hersha didn’t land a hit.

For a split second, you forget the attacks that Welter actually does. You’ve played with him and Hersha about an equal amount of times, but considering that’s definitely within the low double digits for both, compared to Ren who you were playing a few matches a day with for years, you can probably be forgiven for it not jumping to mind as quickly.

You call out the first set that you remember, unsure what exactly he’ll do. You sure hope a couple more jump to mind soon, because if you keep repeating this all match, Virus will never let you live it down.   
Although, if you beat him with only one set, it would be fucking hilarious.

Virus is quick as always, and your first attack doesn’t land either. He has a grin on his face, and you wonder if he’s missed this like you have. You don’t ask, you just focus, and he’s not as secretive as he tells Hersha his next move.

You remember to defend properly this time, instead of just dodging, and take no damage again, more into the rhythm of things as you call to Welter to use a much speedier attack.

He catches Virus this time, even past the defence that Hersha puts up.

You look to Welter for a second, and are reminded of what’s so offputting about them in the field. They have the generic, humanoid form that any allmate online mode comes with, but are completely stone faced while they fight.   
No signs of unease, no feedback whilst they move, no opportunity for conversation. You have to know how to play, because they aren’t doing anything but what they’re told.

You and Virus keep up a back and forth for a while, him managing to get a couple of hits on you, and you even more on him. It takes a long time, but it’s fun.

He doesn’t show the pain much, but neither do you. That doesn’t mean you’re not feeling it. You can tell he’s getting slightly tired out, and unfortunately, you are too. It’s been too long since you’ve played properly. For both of you.

You think, maybe, that Trip is losing his patience. One drive-by safety feature, is sensation being carried over. You don’t think it’s good for much.  
Not much good if someone in the street randomly decides to stab you.   
Also not much good if someone on the sofa next to you has decided that it might be interesting to tug on your hair.  
You fucking hate him.

The distraction of the pain in your hair lets Virus get another hit in, and you glare at him, sending Welter back at him with something that should seriously hurt. 

Whilst he attacks, you feel a hand running up your thigh. 

This is just an unfair advantage. You know that there’s no fucking way he’d pull this shit with Virus. He just wouldn’t. 

“I’m going to kill Trip when we get out of here.” You tell him, and for a second you think that all you get in response is a quirked eyebrow, but then he speaks.

“No you aren’t.” You thought he’d ask why, but he doesn’t. You don’t know if he just doesn’t care or if he assumes you won’t answer.

A few more attacks, with Trip still touching you whilst you do, which you just have to ignore, and you’re both down to under a quarter health. 

Then you can feel lips on yours, and you don’t know quite how to react to that, because even more than the hand on your thigh, it’s weird. It’s weird to still be able to talk, call out commands, whilst you can feel that happening at the same time. You’re pretty sure it’s clear you’re struggling, and you wonder what explanation Virus has come up with for that.  
You wonder why Trip never did this before. He’s had the chance.   
He always does surprise you though, in such a different way to how Virus does. He just. Does things. Weird things. He’s fucking weird, especially when he doesn’t have Virus to give him instruction on what he should do.

Virus takes advantage of your sudden disorientation though, and manages to get another hit in, without you even managing to pull up a defence first, and it knocks you down to zero immediately.

The field doesn’t black out, you aren’t sent back to the real world immediately, instead you get to see Virus’s smug face for a second, as he comments on how he finally beat you, and then goes into his coil to end the drive through.


	5. Foreplay

When you open your eyes, Trip is sat between you and Virus again, looking like he’s been sat there the whole time, a stupid little smirk on his face. You don’t know how he even managed that, but you fucking hate him for it.

He’d said before he could tell how you two were doing in the field, but you’d always figured it was just bluffing.

You don’t know what he even looks for, but clearly he knows it just right, and now Virus won’t even understand what distracted you so badly. You can’t make excuses, he isn’t going to believe you.

So instead, you practically jump Trip, rolling so you can straddle his lap, grinding down against him roughly and kissing him, all within a couple of seconds. 

He lets out a stupid little hum, so fucking pleased with himself, and you bite at his lip, unfortunately giving him an opportunity to try and shove his tongue down your throat.   
So fucking messy, but you’d be lying if you claimed you didn’t enjoy the way he just didn’t care as much as anyone else.

He pisses you off more than Virus does, and honestly you’re pretty sure he pisses Virus off too, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t fun to have around. The dumb shit that he pulls never ceases to amaze you.

He grabs your hair, gently at first, just teasing at it like he had before, twisting it around his fingers in a way that almost pulls, but is more just playful.   
You hate how that’s the part of this that has you having to hold back a moan, the way he’s just gently twisting and playing and rubbing it between the pads of his thumb and his fingers.  
You hate how these two know that about you, and you don’t even remember when you told them, but they’ve always done this.

After a minute of just playing with it in his fingers, Trip properly grabs your hair, tugging on it roughly to get your head back, and immediately going to your neck, messily kissing, biting. He’s absolutely going to leave marks, but that’s not your problem.  
Honestly, you don’t think it’s a problem at all, even though you can tell Aoba disagrees. You look fucking good, with purple marks littered across your neck, on your collarbone, down your chest, leaving absolutely no question of what you’ve been doing. You don’t need to hide them, don’t need to be ashamed of what you enjoy. 

Virus takes the opportunity to talk to you, forcing you to keep your focus despite really not wanting to. “That desperate just from a fight Aoba-san?”  
You frown slightly, turning to look at him, right hand moving from Trips shoulder to gripping his hair, not wanting him to get any stupid ideas like moving away.

“This asshole..” You’re cut off by a harsh bite that hurts more than it feels good, and a soft mutter of “Don’t be rude, Aoba-san.”  
“Was playing with me whilst we were in the field. Nobody ever tell you you’re meant to wait until someone’s conscious Trip?” You finish your thought, and again, it’s Trip who talks. He’s so much better off doing literally anything else with his mouth.  
“Yeah.” He says, acting almost thoughtful for a second, as he kisses at one of the marks, suddenly so soft with you. “Rules like that don’t apply to you.”

He states it like it’s common sense, and Virus nods a little, running a hand down your side, so close against Trip, but all his focus on you. 

“Not when it comes to us at least.” Virus continues the thought, thin fingers stroking gently over your sides.

“Because we know exactly what you want.” His fingers hook under your shirt, and at that exact moment, Trip gives up on his kissing at your neck. You didn’t think he was paying attention, or notice a look between them, but they’re so in sync, and you lift your arms to let him remove your shirt without any complaints.

Trip lets his hand go down to the small of your back, and Virus wraps your arms around Trips shoulders, and you know these two well enough to know that it means you’re moving, so when he stands you easily wrap your legs around him, letting yourself be carried to the bedroom.   
He doesn’t kiss you, you think honestly he’s surprised by how much you weigh, because whilst you’re still thin, you’re not as thin as you were. It’s a little funny, but he doesn’t show any struggle.

Because you aren’t kissing him, you get to look over his shoulder, at Virus, who isn’t exactly putting a show on for you, but you still get to watch him pull off his jacket and his tie, and undo the first few buttons of his shirt.   
Maybe it isn’t a strip tease, but he’s still stripping, and you still get to watch, and the way he chuckles when you wolf whistle at him makes you smile.  
The way Trip hesitates for a split second, and you can feel it in the rhythm of his walk, makes you fully laugh. He’s cute sometimes.

You’re pretty sure that getting the pair of them to let their guard down like this, especially Virus, is something that only you can do. And even then you only get glimpses.

Trip practically throws you onto the bed, and immediately steps back, undoing that awful waistcoat. Trip always gets the worse of the matching outfits, and if it wasn’t for the fact you know full well it’s his fault, you’d almost feel bad for him.

You’re alone for less than a second, because Virus has already set his clothes on a chair, and he’s apparently about as eager as you are, on top of you the moment Trip is gone, kissing you gently.

“Missed me?” You ask teasingly, undoing the remaining buttons on his shirt, fully expecting some bullshit dodging of the question like ‘it’s been a while’. 

So to say you’re taken aback when he simply answers “yes,” would be an understatement.  
Your fingers freeze for a second, and he chuckles in a way that tells you that maybe that was exactly what he was going for.   
He kisses down your neck, leaving his own marks, although you do feel his lips ghost over a few that Trip has left too, teasing the already sore skin. 

“Why ask questions you don’t want to hear the answer to?” He teases. And he’s right, because you knew the real answer, even though you didn’t expect to hear it. You were trying to embarrass him, and he turned it around on you.

So you don’t answer that, instead just undoing his final two buttons, and pushing the shirt off his shoulders, throwing it to the side.

He sits, and you don’t even need to be told to follow him up, doing it immediately so that you can keep kissing him.   
A second later you feel the bed shift with the weight of Trip, and he settles behind you, resting his hands on your hips and kissing at the back of your shoulders.   
Virus stays on your lap, kissing you, far less messy with it than Trip ever is, but giving you something to focus on whilst Trip first marks the back of your shoulders, which are far less sensitive, so you’re glad he doesn’t put too much time into it, and then kisses down your hair, taking a strand between his fingers again.

You don’t know why he’s so focused on your hair today, and you honestly don’t remember if your hair has always been this sensitive, but you’re loving it. He very softly combs his fingers through your hair, following along with his mouth, kissing down the back of your head, down your neck, down to the tips of your hair.

He sucks on the tips and you let out a surprised moan into Virus’s mouth, him immediately pulling away from the kiss, annoying as he is, but you manage to cut yourself off, so it’s fine.

“Let us hear you.” Virus says, an instruction rather than a request, and he pinches a nipple, which you weren’t expecting, so it sure does get some noise out of you. Not really a moan, closer to some awful fucking squeak, which you’d rather he just didn’t notice, but instead he smiles ever so slightly, kissing you again.

“You’re so pretty.” He says, and Trip hums in agreement, moving slightly to press up against your back, kissing the side of your neck instead, his hands around your front to undo your belt and your pants.   
Virus removes his own, shifting off your lap to do so, which makes it easier for Trip to push your pants and underwear off your legs. He keeps nipping at your neck as he does, not needing to see to get it done, and you’re glad you don’t lose all the contact.  
You assume he must have taken his own off whilst Virus was over you, because he’s definitely not wearing anything now. You’re not complaining.


	6. Fucking

“Knees.” Trip tells you, and you sit back on your heels. He doesn’t usually tell you what to do, not as much as Virus does, but you listen to him better. Virus leaves more room for playing around, Trip knows what he expects and doesn’t like it when you make him wait.  
You aren’t looking to get punished today. Sometimes it could be fun, but you just want them to fuck you today. Not tease you or hurt you too much.

“Good boy.” He says, right into your ear, nipping at the shell of it as Virus settles in front of you again.  
“So strange to see you like this.” Virus says, one hand reaching out to stroke down a scar you have on your stomach.

You quirk a brow at him, not really sure what his point is, but then you see Trip nod, saying quickly, “So plain.”   
He kisses softly down your neck, at the marks he’s already left, saying single words between kisses, “Well. We. Can. Fix. That.”  
His fingers dig into your sides roughly, and he bites at a point he hasn’t yet, sucking roughly on the skin. 

At the same time, Virus kisses down your chest, nipping lightly, a much lighter trail of red marks. Those won’t stick. You almost tell him that, but you’re enjoying the contrast, and he must know anyway.

He keeps up those small nips down your body, and Trip continues his much harsher bites, fingers pulling on your nipples. You should get pierced sometime. 

Mizuki refused when you were younger, you were what, 15? 16? At the time.  
He didn’t think you were old enough. You don’t know why you never asked again, when he started serving you at the bar. Clearly he thought you were then.   
Or maybe he just knew you were going to drink whether he served you or not. Rather you were somewhere safe than out god knows where. You wouldn’t doubt that.

“You two ever going to fuck me?” You ask, wanting something else to focus on. Thinking about Mizuki is great and all, but you’d rather save it for when Mizuki’s fucking you. Which is definitely going to happen later. 

“Impatient.” Virus says, and you swear he fucking tuts at you, before shifting back from you, really not what you were looking for, leaning back on his elbows.

Trip, clearly believing you to be a fucking moron who can’t take cues, pushes on your back, and if you didn’t know what he wanted it would just be a fucking disaster, but you do, so you fold forward, over Virus, forearms by his sides, ass up, positioned perfectly for them.

You kiss the inside of his thigh, a hand immediately gripping into your hair to redirect you, rough enough that it fucking hurts but gentle enough that you don’t literally scream.

They know you know he doesn’t like that, so to be fair, you were kind of asking for it, but you still glare up at him.

“Asshole.” He just shrugs, still comfortably laid back, and you didn’t know it was Trip, but you aren’t at all surprised to find it out. Such a fucking kissass.

You lick up Virus’s dick, from the base right to the tip. He prefers you use a bit more technique, unlike Trip, who is generally quite happy to just shove it down your throat. 

Honestly, you find Trip easier, a lot more just let him do what he wants. But at least Virus lets you breathe.

As you lick over the tip, you feel a cold finger press into you without warning. You guess you should be happy he even considered lube, but instead you’re just frustrated he didn’t let it warm up a second.

He only gives a few thrusts before he adds a second finger, and you let out a small moan around Virus, feeling a lot more stretched than usual.

“Tight.” He comments, and you don’t know if it’s just because he’s surprised or because he thinks Virus cares. 

You don’t think Virus cares, but maybe he does. You’re pretty sure Trip knows that better than you, but you’re also quite confident that Virus is far too focused on you sucking his dick to care.

As he should be, because you’re fucking good at it.

He isn’t moaning yet, he never really gets loud, but he’s watching you, meeting your eyes. He always looks so intense, completely enthralled by you. You can’t say it’s not a little flattering.

When you were younger you cared a little more about how these two adored you. Everybody else was scared of you, and it made them special.   
Now you’re used to them, and you don’t know if that’s better or not. They still interest you, things never get too samey with them, so it’s definitely not bad.

You take Virus deeper, hollow cheeks, more focused on your tongue than how deep he actually is, knowing he prefers that. 

Trip pulls his fingers out, even though you’re not sure you’re stretched enough really, and he doesn’t touch you for a minute, but then he’s pressing the tip of his dick against your entrance, pressing in slowly at first, until he bottoms out, and then much quicker and harsher as he thrusts into you, and you have to support yourself more on your elbows to keep yourself steady, pace immediately changing with Virus to match.

He digs his fingers into your hips, you hope that’s going to bruise, thrusting quickly. He doesn’t hit perfectly inside you every time, but he makes up for it with how rough he is, and he gets it sometimes, hard and making you moan out.

You have a minute of that, Trip fucking into you, Virus probably still watching, although you’ve given up on watching him back, before you hear the annoying ringtone of your coil.

Who the fuck is even calling you? Why? It’s not like you have anything you have to do today. Probably. Not that you’ve been paying enough attention to know. And you really don’t care.   
You have to pull off Virus for a second, so that you can reach your hand over to hit hang up on the coil. You don’t look at who it is. They’ll get sent to Aoba’s super polite voicemail, they’ll cope. It’ll tell them you’ll call back later, but you won’t, unless you’re interested in fucking with them.  
You set it to silent, which you probably should have considered earlier, but you didn’t think anyone would be fucking calling.

Trip laughs a little at you, and Virus waits until you’re back to sucking his dick, a hand resting on your head so that you can’t move away, before talking, his voice pretty steady, although he’s definitely pausing at points to manage himself.

“Who was that, Aoba-san?” He asks, not wanting an answer, and very quickly continuing, “Do you not think they.. wanted to watch?”   
You hadn’t thought of it, but it is a good idea. You bet it would’ve been fucking funny to see, or probably just hear, their reaction to watching you suck Virus’s dick. It’s fun to let people watch sometimes, although you’ve never actually done it with Virus and Trip.   
You get the idea they really don’t like sharing with anyone else. Virus is simply teasing you with something he knows you’ll like the idea of.

“He looks very pretty doesn’t he?” Trip comments, thrusting into you again, and when you moan out, he adds quickly, “Ah… Sounds pretty too.”  
“Did you come to see us first?” Virus asks, again, really not a question, lacing his fingers in your hair to actually control your pace himself, forcing you to take him further  
“We’re very pleased you chose to see us.” He continues, and you really don’t know why these two love to talk to you so much, but they’re always so positive and just. Strangely nice to you, and you can’t help but enjoy it. 

Normally if people are nice to you, they also just won’t give you what you need. But Virus and Trip are perfectly happy to fuck you till you can barely remember your name and still be sweet about it. They’re fun, and they think you’re fun too.

Trip folds himself over you, biting your shoulder, one hand falling directly next to your own and the other wrapping around your midsection to finally wrap around your dick, finally starting to jerk you off, more or less in time with his thrusts.

You feel him grin against your shoulder as you moan louder, desperately trying to rock your hips into his touches, get him to speed up. 

“Ah..” You hear Virus let out, and you swear the only reason he speaks after is because he thinks you’ll be stupid enough to believe that wasn’t a moan if he just keeps talking.  
“Aoba-san.” The pause he leaves is far too long, and he either realises that you know, or just gives up on trying to say anything that makes sense, because he continues with, “You’re very cute..”

You almost laugh at that, and it’s enough to actually make you feel like you may choke for a second, even though you had been managing so well before. Idiots.

He doesn’t loosen his grip to let you pull off, but you don’t try either. You can cope with it fine, and it only takes a second for you to calm yourself again, and he fucks your mouth harder now. 

Neither of them are giving you any sort of break, just fucking you hard. You don’t think they’re going to do anything more than fuck you today, even though you’d love to feel them fully destroy you. That takes them time, and they don’t go full out like this to start. Next time you come over, you’ll ask them.

For today though, you’re just enjoying this, being fucked and filled, roughly, properly, and able to feel it properly. It’s just not the same when Aoba is getting fucked and you have to just watch. That’s really a massive fucking tease.

“Distracted?” Virus asks, and you suppose maybe you’d gotten sloppy. It’s hard not to be sloppy with how Trip is fucking you anyway, but you try to refocus, pulling back to lick over the head and then taking all of him in one smooth movement, pulling another moan out of him, which he doesn’t try to cover this time.

Trip doesn’t moan so much as grunt, but it shows he’s satisfied all the same, which is good enough for you. He’s close, you can tell, movements harsher and messier, stroking you faster too. 

You’re glad for the minute that it isn’t Virus fucking you. He likes to try and make you hold off until he finishes, and you swear he deliberately holds off to make you wait even longer.

Trip on the other hand, couldn’t care less, continuing to fuck you hard despite the fact it’s incredibly obvious that you’re getting close. 

He bites hard at soft bits of skin on your shoulders, up to your neck, very harsh on sensitive skin and still thrusting into you.

He manages, by pure luck, to hit perfectly within you twice in a row, and he clearly notices how loud you get around Virus, because he actually sticks with it, thank fuck.

You’re so close, hands digging into the bed as you desperately wait for him to just give you something more. Anything more, or even just keep that up for a little while longer.

He doesn’t make you wait long, luckily, pulling off your neck with a pop and immediately going just behind your ear, directly at the roots of your hair, sucking at what’s practically live nerves, and it’s too much, far too much, pushing you over the edge easily.

You spill over your stomach, Trip still thrusting into you through it, jerking you off still until you’re oversensitive. You basically stop moving yourself at all, surprised your arms even hold up under you, but glad for it. Virus is deep in your mouth, and you feel him spill pretty soon after you, clearly pleased by you moaning around him, and you swallow around him immediately.

Trip takes a minute longer, still fucking you hard, and it’s too much for a short while, sore and overwhelming and at least he releases your hair when he feels you coming down, kissing your neck softly instead, and you hear him let out something that’s finally more like a moan as he finishes inside you.

He pulls out after a minute, unfolding himself from over you and stroking over your hips, nice and gentle with you, giving you the chance to shift yourself off of Virus, roll over onto your back and catch your fucking breath.


	7. Food

Virus pets his fingers through your hair for a minute, ever so gentle, just as you lay back by his side, breathing heavily. He doesn’t try to touch you any more than that, just relaxing by your side and petting through your hair for a minute.

Trip disappears, and you’re not sure where to, but you don’t care for the time being, just closing your eyes and relaxing. It’s not even midday, you aren’t going to sleep, but you are going to relax for a while.

Virus strokes down your hair, brushing over your neck with his fingertips gently, making it clear to you just how sore those marks are. You want to look at them. 

“Much better.” He says, and you do agree you must look must more yourself now. You hope so at least. You feel a lot more normal, you don’t have that itch under your skin demanding something Immediately. You still want to have fun, but you don’t feel absolutely desperate just to be moving and doing things anymore. You’re glad for that. 

They fucked the restlessness out of you. So. Definitely better in more ways than one. You’re feeling pretty good now, so maybe you should get ready to leave sometime soon. You won’t though. It’s nice to just lay here for a minute.

You two both just lay there for a moment, Virus varying between petting your hair and stroking over your hickeys. You don’t look at him, and you wonder if he’s looking at you, or if he’s got his eyes closed too, just enjoying being with you.

When Trip comes back, you hear rather than see it, because he’s so heavy-footed. You open your eyes, looking over at him, and he has some food in his arms. That’s. Probably actually a good idea.   
Or at least it would be if it was real food. Although you don’t know what real food you’d want to eat right now, so maybe the junk he’s holding is a good idea.

You sit up, cross legged on the bed, smiling slightly at him as he comes over with the food.

You look to Virus, and he’s sat too, looking at Trip disapprovingly. You wonder if Trip went to his room to get all this, and Virus didn’t even know it was in the apartment. It really wouldn’t surprise you.

“Have you eaten today Aoba-san?” Virus asks you, and he, quite correctly, takes the shrug you give in response to mean no.  
“You know you should really take care of yourself better.” He scolds, but he clearly doesn’t actually care. You both know that you’re not going to be here long, so it doesn’t matter if you look after yourself or not. It’s like having a cheat day.

Trip nods, humming and dropping his armful of snacks on the bad before sitting himself next to you, right against your side. Someone sure is feeling affectionate today.

You and him both reach out at the same time, but luckily you both grab different things, him going for a bag of Cheetos and you grabbing a soda. He’s brought a couple of them in, and you sure hope he isn’t expecting to get to drink either of them, because you don’t even care which flavours they are, you’re just fucking thirsty.

You’re in the middle of downing your first bottle when Trip decides that you deserve a Cheeto, having already eaten a couple himself. 

He holds one out for you expectantly, and you quickly finish your drink, just setting it on the bed once it’s empty. You open your mouth so he can feed it to you, knowing he’s just going to take your hand away if you try to take it from him anyway. 

You’re pretty sure Virus is just tidying after you two, because the bottle disappears from where you put it down. He doesn’t care to try and feed you too, instead just letting Trip do it, and after a second he gets up, heading off with his clothes in hand. Off to shower, you assume.

Trip watches after him for a second, but then returns to feeding you more, a small smile on his face as he does.   
“Slow.” You comment after a second, and Trip gets the idea, starting to grab multiple at a time to give to you, letting you scoff them down, and doing the same himself. Eating handfuls from someone else is slightly awkward, but you don’t let any fall on the bed at least. Virus might kill you if you did. 

When you notice that the bag is nearly empty you grab the second bag, in a second flavour, opening it yourself and eating one before Trip can take them from you. He doesn’t seem to actually care much though, too focused on the fact he still has some in his own bag.

You eat another yourself, and then hold the next in front of Trips face. He laughs a little before wrapping his lips round the Cheeto and your fingers to take it from them, pulling off with a pop and a bit of a grin.

He finishes feeding you from the first bag, you still only grabbing one at a time from the second to feed to each of you, but once he’s finished with his, you start grabbing more from the bag you’re holding.

You open the second soda, drinking it whilst you feed Trip a handful. Your handfuls are definitely smaller than his, but you’re still enjoying being the one feeding you both for once. 

You don’t drink the whole thing in one this time, setting it to the side so that you can finish it in a minute, and in the second it’s taken you to do that, Trip has grabbed himself a box of pocky.  
Strawberry. He has plain chocolate here too, and you don’t know if you’re going to end up eating that or just leaving it. You’re definitely not full yet.

You eat a few more Cheetos whilst he messes with the packaging, and once you hear it’s open you open your mouth expectantly, only to not get fed anything. You turn to look at him, and he’s got it hanging out of his mouth.

Dumbass.

You reach for a pocky, and he grabs your hand to stop you, instead just raising his eyebrows at you. Great. So fucking stupid. You swear he still acts like such a child.

It’s cute though, in his own, stupid way, and you take the other end of the pocky into your mouth, eating along it quickly. Unsurprisingly, you don’t have any issues with the idea of kissing Trip, and honestly you’re more interested in just getting to eat.

You don’t know if Aoba ever played, you don’t think so. He was too scared of having any fucking fun as a kid. And you were too old, so you never played it.

You eat along it quickly though, rushing to try and eat more than him, not doing the stupid slow teasing thing, because you just don’t care for it. He doesn’t move at all, and you don’t know if that’s how the game is meant to be played or because he just doesn’t feel like it.

It means you get to eat most of the stick though, so you’re happy enough, kissing him gently for a second when you reach the end and pulling away with a laugh.  
“Are you seriously going to make me eat all of them like this?” You ask, mouth still full as you talk.  
He shrugs, and you assume it’s because the answer is entirely based on how pissed off you seem by the idea. 

You’re not eating a whole pack of pocky, one by one, from his mouth. Not a chance. It would just take far too long.   
“I’m taking the spares when I leave.” You tell him, grabbing another handful of Cheetos and eating them.  
“But we can eat them like this for now.” He smiles when you tell him that, immediately putting another between his lips. 

Virus would never humour him with dumb shit like this, but you just find it amusing, the silly things that make him happy. It’s a bit of fun spending time with him, just relaxing. And it’s definitely good to eat something, even if it’s slow.

You eat a couple more with him holding them between his lips, letting you eat nearly the whole stick, and then you reach to grab one again.  
He lets you this time, and you place one end between your teeth, wiggling it at him for a second before letting it sit still so that he can actually catch the end in his mouth.

For a second you’re considering just letting him eat it all like he had for you, but he’s going slowly, just nibbling along, so you copy him, slowly heading towards the centre of it and kissing him a little longer this time, laughing a little when you pull away from him.

You repeat it a couple of times, and then go back to your Cheetos, which you’ve nearly finished. You have another handful, and then offer the final few to Trip.   
He grabs your hand with his own before eating them, and you’re about to ask him why when he licks up your palm, cleaning off the dust. 

“Gross.” You comment quietly, but you don’t bother to move your hand away as he licks it clean. You eat another pocky whilst he does, and then once he’s done you put one more pocky in your mouth to offer it to him, nibbling along and kissing him a bit longer this time, arm over his shoulder to keep him close for a second. 

When you pull away this time you nip at his lip, and then you lean back to grab your drink, downing the rest of it whilst you stand up.

He looks a little confused, and you just shrug at him. “Got to go shower.”   
You aren’t interested in getting fucked again, at least not yet, and you’re done eating, so you don’t need to stick around a whole lot longer.

“If you could find me a hoodie that’d be great.” You tell him as you leave the room. You don’t imagine they’ll have any, but it’ll give him something to do that doesn’t include following you to the shower, and if he does manage to find you something that doesn’t look horrible then that’s great.

You don’t take your clothes to the bathroom with you, you’ll get them after, instead just heading to the shower you know Trip uses. Virus has his own off his room, which you assume he’s using at the moment. Or maybe he’s just hiding in his room to avoid you both.

You look over yourself in the bathroom mirror, smiling at it. You look good. Both sides of your neck are covered in red marks, and they continue down your shoulders. You turn awkwardly to see if you can spot any on the back of your shoulders, and smile more when you spot them. Good.

They won’t all be visible once you’re dressed, neither will the marks on your hips, but they’ll be there, and at least some of them will be visible over your shirt, another good reason not to actually wear a hoodie.   
Tomorrow Aoba’s going to see what you’ve done, and he’ll have to deal with wanting to hide that. You wonder a little how sore he’ll be. There’s no way it’ll be anything worse than what you’ve dealt with before, but you feel like it’ll be new to him. 

If you wanted to make the marks show less you’d probably have a cold shower, but cold showers suck and you want the marks, so when you turn the shower on you already set it to warm, and as you wash yourself off you slowly turn it up. 

You do your hair first, even though it’s annoying, just to get it over and done with. You use Trips shampoo, and you think this conditioner is probably literally five years old, but at least it’ll make your hair sit nicely. You don’t actually believe in expiration dates on cleaning products. Even on food, it’s always more of a suggestion really. If it smells fine, it’s fine.

You aren’t having a long shower, so once you’re done with your hair you move on quickly to emptying yourself. You hate that, but it beats leaking cum into your boxers all day by a long shot, so it has to be done.

It only takes you a minute, fingers pressing into yourself and trying to get whatever you can reach. It won’t be everything, but it beats not trying at all. Although you aren’t really sure by how much.

After that you scrub yourself off, and use his body wash, nearly empty. You let yourself stand there for a minute, just enjoying the hot water, and then get out, grabbing a towel and drying yourself off quickly. First your hair, then the rest of your body, and then continuing with more focus on your hair. These two don’t own a hairdryer, so you’re going to be leaving with wet hair, but you’ll cope. And you’ll get it as dry as you can before going.

So you walk back out of the bathroom, drying your hair and heading straight back to the room you were in. Neither of them are there, which is kind of disappointing, but at least it gives you a good chance to get dressed without them distracting you.

Once you’re dressed you grab the rest of the pocky and head back into the main room of the apartment, smiling slightly when you spot the pair of them. Virus is fully dressed, and Trip is only in boxers. You bet Virus forced him to put something on whilst he waited for the shower.

You kind of wish you could know how these two act when it’s just them, but you also feel like it’s probably just. Strange. You want to see it, but it might just be disturbing.   
You feel like you’ve seen bits of it, in how Virus seems to get frustrated and that tone he uses with Trip sometimes, but it must be something different when they’re alone. They must get along sometimes. 

Trip walks past you to go and shower, and you immediately slap him on the ass. He’s not wearing pants, what can he expect? He doesn’t really react at all, just continuing on, and you laugh a little at him. 

Virus ignores it too, instead just smiling politely at you. “Are you leaving Aoba-san?”

You nod, ruffling Welters fur before heading for the door.

“Well. Have a fun day. You’ll come see us again when you can?” He really doesn’t have to ask, because of course you’re going to, and he knows that.

“Obviously.” You tell him, and just as you’re about to head out you turn around, remembering, “I need your coil details again. Don’t know when he lost them but I’m not walking all the way here just to find you’re not here.”

He laughs slightly, and gives you a call, which you quickly decline, adding the contact to your coil.

“Do you think you’ll be seeing us often then?” He asks you, and he’s clearly digging for information which you don’t really have. He wants to know why you’re here.

You don’t tell him that you don’t know though, because admitting to these two that you aren’t sure about why something is happening really doesn’t sound like a good idea. In fact it sounds like an incredibly bad one.

“We’ll see.” You tell him, opening the door, and he just hums slightly in agreement, calling out to you as you leave, “See you.”


	8. Forgotten

He didn’t give you Trip’s details. Not that you need them, you’d call Virus first any day. Aoba better not delete them. You save Virus’s details to the same place you had your Rhyme field just in case though. He doesn’t know how to get to those files, so it’ll be a good backup.

You’re walking back in the direction you came from, pretty much everywhere you could want to be is that way, and you check your coil as you go.

It was Mizuki who called you earlier. Makes sense. Means you can head straight to the hospital again, not have to try and occupy yourself for a while. He didn’t leave a message, and you aren’t going to call him back. You want to see him in person.

You eat your pocky whilst you’re walking, a little slower than you were earlier, but still going pretty quick. Sure you’re not as antsy, but you still want to see him. 

It takes far too long to get there, walking just generally takes far too long around here. You know they’re so far from everything else because it’s nicer here, but it’s also just an annoyance. 

Normally everywhere you go is pretty close to everywhere else, black needle, bothering Mizuki, his team, finding Usui. And you used to find these two out and about, so they’d walk with you to their place, making it a lot less boring.   
The walk back after was always alone, so you’re used to it. ‘Walk of shame’ you suppose, even though you feel absolutely no shame about it. 

Honestly, you consider going to Koujaku’s team base. It’s not an area you know well, but you could find your way there based on what you’ve seen Aoba do. You won’t though, at least not yet. You want to see Mizuki first, and even though it’d be funny to see Koujaku like this, you really aren’t sure he’d be any fun. 

You wonder if he’d even understand. You wonder if Mizuki is going to understand. He knows that when Aoba left the hospital he wasn’t quite the same. You could see him waiting for when Aoba could recover enough to be who he expected him to be. To be you.

You don’t know when he stopped waiting, but you know he did. He got used to Aoba as he was, and he started to like Aoba as he was. Quite logically, he just assumed that you’d finally calmed the fuck down now that you were a little older. He still tried to goad him into a fight sometimes, make fun of him for playing Rhyme, which Aoba didn’t even remember.  
And you’d try to push forward, you wanted a fight, but those pills kept you down so much that you could barely even watch sometimes.

Mizuki will be happy to see you. You’re sure of it. He has to be. Even though he’s going to be confused about why you’re back, and probably doesn’t even understand that you coming ‘back’ was ever an option, he’ll be happy to see you.

It won’t be as easy as with Virus and Trip. You could just walk back into their lives, after years of nothing, and you didn’t even have to explain yourself. They knew.   
They understand everything about you, and on one hand maybe that should really be a concern, because you never knew too well yourself, and you definitely never told them, but on the other hand you really just don’t fucking care, because it’s them.   
They just know things.

Nobody else just understands like that. Mizuki knows you, he knows what you’re like, he understands you. But he doesn’t understand everything. 

You’re still eager to see him though. Even though he doesn’t understand everything, he doesn’t have to. Not to spend time with you and have some fun.

It takes something like forever to actually reach the hospital again, and you head immediately to Mizuki’s room once you’re there, walking in and closing the door behind you immediately. You want to be alone with him.

“Yo.” He greets, “How..” When you turn around he clearly spots the marks on your neck, and he sits up more from how he was back against his headboard, asking quickly, “Are you alri..” 

You grin at him as you head towards him, and he cuts himself off, tilting his head in that cute little curious way, peering closer at the marks and looking a little surprised when he realises what they are, “Wow Aoba.”

“Sly.” You correct him, because you didn’t care when Virus and Trip called you that, you knew that they knew who you were. But with him, you don’t think you’re who he thinks of when he says that. At least not for now.   
He used to call you Aoba, although he knew you as Sly first. Everyone knew you as Sly first, if they hadn’t known about your Rhyme then they were clearly living under a rock.

You don’t think you mind him calling you Aoba now. Maybe. But you want to be very clear that you’re not that Aoba, because you want him to be seeing you. So you have to correct him anyway, sitting on the visitors seat next to his bed, so that you’re practically right in front of him.

“Sly.” He repeats back, looking confused more than happy, trying to figure you out. He doesn’t meet your eyes for more than a second, and honestly, you think he’s only confused. He doesn’t know, so you shouldn’t be mad at him for it, but you are, a little.

More than a little. You want him to be happy to see you, and to actually care that it’s you, and he just looks lost, like he’s bothered by the way you aren’t what he expected. 

You’re worried for a second that he just won’t know you at all, because he looks so lost, and you wonder how broken he really was. He looks okay now, basically himself, which is all you’d thought to really worry about, but he looks like he isn’t sure who you actually are, and you hadn’t expected that to really be a problem.

You give him a second more of trying to figure you out, and when you don’t notice anything more in his eyes you just wrap one arm over his shoulder, gently lace your fingers into his hair and pull him in to a kiss.

You’re incredibly gentle with him, as if he’s fragile, even though you’re sure that he’s not. He survived whatever exactly was done to him, he survived Aoba destroying him, he’s not fragile. 

You just don’t want to surprise him too much, and you want to leave him the chance to push you off if he wants.

He doesn’t push you off, which is good, because if he did you would probably just leave. You don’t want to be here if he doesn’t want you here.  
He also doesn’t really respond for a second, but he gets the idea after a bit, kissing back, a fair bit rougher than you were being.

You pull away after a minute, a bright grin on your face, and he smiles back a little.

“Got it?” You ask, and he shakes his head slightly, but you just laugh now, because even if he’s still confused, he’s smiling at you and not looking at you like you’re an alien anymore.

You kind of want to explain to him a little, but you don’t know what to say. Just tell him you’re what you were like years ago? Tell him about the fact that you and Aoba are split from each other? He’s been through weirder things, maybe he’d just accept that? 

“I’m Sly Blue. The Aoba you knew. Also our Desire.” You kiss him gently again, grinning. “Two personalities.” It’s a simplification, but it’ll do to get the point across to him, and he nods slightly, even though he may not completely get it.

“Koujaku only ever knew Reason, the other Aoba.” You continue, telling him, “You know when we changed though. I could see you waiting.”

You missed him. You’re sure he missed you too, even though he couldn’t understand it then. 

“You’re just. Completely different?” He asks, and you nod a little. He believes you at least.

He punches you in the arm, not really trying to hurt you but also definitely not gentle. “Asshole. It’s been years! Where were you? Why weren’t you here?”

You hop onto the bed next to him, and he tries to push you away, so you wrap an arm around him, steadying yourself and keeping yourself on the bed. “Calm down. Just lay down with me.” You tell him, pulling him down with you, so that you can lay face to face with him.

Even though he lets himself be pulled down he still looks angry, mad at you, even though none of this was your fucking fault. “Calm down? You left!”

“I didn’t leave!” You two don’t normally fight, but you can’t have him thinking this was your fault. You grab his hands, squeezing them hard, trying to convince him.

“Then what do you call..” You cut him off, kissing him hard, you can’t deal with listening to him blame you, it’s not your fault, he shouldn’t be blaming you like this, you tried so fucking hard.

He pulls his hands from you and tries to push you away, harder this time. “Don’t just kiss me to shut me up! Talk to me!”

“If you want to talk then talk. Don’t yell and blame me for things you don’t understand.” You tell him, and you don’t know how you’re holding yourself together, because you need to Make him shut up, but you know it would hurt him. You don’t add any force, despite how much you want to.   
Hopefully he’ll calm down without it. You have a feeling that adding it would just make things worse.

He takes a couple of deep breaths, eyes closed, completely ignoring you a second, and you breathe a little too, watching him. You think you see tears, but you don’t touch him now, just watching, until he finally speaks after a minute.

“If you didn’t leave. Then what do you call. Being gone for three years? Making me feel like I’d been completely forgotten?” You have to take a few deep breaths now, try and calm yourself, because you know it upset him, but it upset you too, and you hate how he’s still blaming you.

“I call it Reason taking drugs every time I made any attempt to talk to you, forcing me down, never giving me any fucking chance, because Tae decided for us that I wasn’t fucking good enough.” You tell him, and before he can even try to say something, you add on, “And don’t act like you weren’t friends with him. I had to sit and watch whilst you completely forgot about me, see how you completely gave up on the idea of me ever being back.”

He seems to calm down when you mention that the drugs kept you down, accepting that as a good enough excuse. He doesn’t know how hard you tried, but you’re sure he saw Reason taking them multiple times, and maybe he’s remembering them, realising that you’re not just making up fucking excuses.

“Well I couldn’t know could I? You never told me about this.” He says, but instead of accusing now he just looks sad, and he kisses you gently. 

You shrug a little. It’s true he didn’t know. You didn’t ever know that Reason would be coming back though. And you definitely didn’t know that you wouldn’t have any chance again. “Fine. Fair. I didn’t know I wouldn’t be back. I tried though.” You tell him.

“You tried?” He asks, and you nod. “Yeah. A lot. I could see everything.” You tell him, and you frown.

“I can’t believe you forgave him for that fucking awful scrap.” He frowns when you say that, very quickly saying, “We agreed not to talk about that.”

“I didn’t.” You tell him plainly. You don’t care what him and Reason agreed. “Why did you forgive him?” 

“What else was I going to do? Lose one of my friends? Hating him wouldn’t have helped me at all. And I’m fine now.” He’s so fucking nice. Aoba didn’t deserve that. He didn’t deserve Mizuki still liking him, after spending years stopping you from seeing him, helping him at all. Even if he didn’t fucking know. He still messed up. 

“He should have let me help.” You tell him. It’s not really a comfort to him, but you need to say it. You need him to know how much you wanted to help out. You would have got his Scrap right. Sure you only ever destroyed people before, but you know you would have got it.

Maybe he wouldn’t have ended up needing it if you’d just been there for him. If you’d been allowed to, instead of completely written off as undesirable.  
His past is the past attitude really must make this stuff easier.


	9. Flirt

“I was just about to say I missed you, but then you reminded me of how fucking pouty you get when you don’t get your way.” He says with a laugh, shifting a little closer to you. “I guess I missed you anyway though. Even if you’re a pain in the ass.”

You kick gently at his leg, and smile at him slightly. “I just wanted you to know I tried.” You say, and then you shrug a little. “But I’ll stop on it. What do you want to talk about? Anything I missed?”

You’ve been watching, but you’ve probably missed a lot anyway. And you want to know what he thought was important.

“I don’t want to talk about everything that happened then.” He tells you, and you nod a little. “I’ve been doing well lately though. I should be ready to go back to black needle soon. I’m not going back to Dry Juice yet though.”

“Why not?” You don’t mind that he’s not, but you know his team is important to him. You can’t imagine him wanting to work but not wanting to be with them.

“I’ve been told Kyo is doing a good job stepping in as leader. And I’m not ready to face them again yet.” He tells you, and you nudge him roughly.

“If I’m not allowed to be all sad then you aren’t either. I’m sure your team are excited to see you again.” You tell him. You can’t know for definite, but you know they all absolutely love him.

“That’s what Koujaku and Aoba keep telling me. And they’ve been seeing them.” He says, and you hate slightly how he calls reason Aoba. He adds after, “Still though. I’m not ready yet. I’ll just spend some time with them at the bar and slowly start joining in with things again.”

You nod a little. “Hopefully I’ll be there for you.” You say, and it’s true, you really want to be here for him now that you feel like maybe you can. For him and for the fact you enjoy seeing him.

“Hopefully?” He asks, and you just have to shrug a little at him. “I don’t know why I’m here today. Don’t imagine I’ll be here tomorrow. So. Hopefully I’ll see you more soon. If not then you still have Koujaku and Reason.”

He frowns a little, and it makes you grin. He’s bothered by the idea of not seeing you again. He wants you, not just Reason. That’s more like what you were expecting.

“You’ll be the first person I’ll come see.” You tell him, meant to be a comfort, but he laughs, hand going up to your neck, pressing hard and making you wince slightly.

“First, huh?” He teases, and you’re so glad for that tone, him playing around with you, it’s just. Right.

“I came here first. You were just sleeping.” You tell him, kissing him again. “I was being considerate.”

He laughs a little at you describing yourself as considerate, clearly unconvinced. Rude. Fair, but still rude.

“Just like you were considerate to get all of these?” He kind of asks, although it’s not really a fair question.

“He’s going to hate these.” He continues, and you love how he’s changed to saying he. Instead of Aoba. You nod a little at the statement, grinning at him. 

He shakes his head a little, stroking at the sensitive skin. “I don’t know why you love this so much. You must know how childish it is.” 

You shrug a little. Maybe it’s kind of childish, but you like how it looks, being covered and marked like this. “Hypocrite.” You say, and he raises an eyebrow, pressing hard on a mark again, you think just to punish you a little.

“Exactly my point. You fucking love them.” You tell him, and he shrugs a little, “Maybe.”

He doesn’t get flustered easily, not anymore. When you were younger, and he hadn’t got with you yet, he was a bit easier to get to. Telling him about things you’d done, who you’d been with, constantly flirting. It got to him at least a little.

Now he’s always just trying to turn it around on you. It’s fun being together with him. He plays around with you, but he also cares about you. 

“I look hot, and more myself.” You say, and he really can’t argue with that, despite how you can tell he wants to. Even though he wouldn’t walk around looking like this, he absolutely loves it on you.

“Definitely more yourself.” He agrees. And you know he agrees you’re hot too. “More extreme than normal, but I guess that’s just you trying to make the best of being here.”

You nod a little, you sure are trying to make the best of it, “And it’s also just how Trip is.” You laugh a little, but he just frowns at you mentioning Trips name, looking really bothered by it for some reason.  
“What’s that about?” You ask him, and he shrugs, forcing a bit of a smile back onto his face.

“You know they’re Yakuza now right?” He asks, and you nod at him. “They spend a lot of time around my teams territory.” You hadn’t considered he might not get along with them, but this doesn’t sound like much of an issue, really.

“Do they give you any trouble?” You ask. They’ve never struck you as people who start trouble for the sake of it. They do things that are fun, and fights can be fun, but you’re sure they have better people to fight than random Dry Juice members for the hell of it.

“Suppose not.” He answers, but he still doesn’t seem satisfied. “Something about them just isn’t right.” You nod a little, of course you know that. You’d have to be stupid to not know they’re not quite right, but they’re on your side of things.  
You feel like there must be more, an actual reason for him to dislike them, but he wouldn’t hide things. Maybe they really do just make that bad an impression when around.

“Just be careful with them.” He tells you, and you nod a little. Of course you’re careful with them. You don’t need telling that. And if that’s all he wants, to know you’re careful with them, then you’re happy to tell him that. 

“Anyway.” He takes a breath, wanting to change the topic, which you’re 100% onboard with. “Do you know what.. Reason? Has been doing?”

“Whining over his stupid boyfriend leaving. I assume.” You tell him, and he laughs a little, saying after a second, “I really thought you would’ve liked Noiz.”

“Well. Until he scrapped him, yeah. Seems like he just ruined everything fun in him though. I would’ve loved a go with that little masochist.” Mizuki looks a little confused, and you realise Aoba might not have explained to the rest of them about Noiz. Probably thought it wasn’t their business. 

You’re telling Mizuki anyway.

“Until he was scrapped he basically had all his nerves completely dulled apart from in his tongue. Played Rhyme because he could feel when things hurt in there. And then Reason fixed him, and he ran right off.” Mizuki clearly knew he’d ran off, but you don’t think he’d heard about how messed up the kid was. You wish you’d had a chance to screw with him.

“You don’t need to explain that.” He says, wrapping a leg around yours, and it’s your turn to look a little lost. 

“I know exactly what you mean by him being a masochist. Ao-“ He either sees your face drop or just corrects himself anyway, “Reason, told me all about it.”

“Then why did you look so confused?” You ask, and he laughs at you, teasing at one of the marks again.

“Because even though you might be good at getting what you want, the second you’ve got someone into your bed you’ve not got a dominant bone in you. Sure you’d love to hurt him in Rhyme, but you wouldn’t ‘have a go’ with him.” He tells you, and.. You’re really not sure you can actually disagree with that. Not convincingly at least, he knows you too well.

“What did you think of him then? Would’ve loved to at least see you have a go with him.” You tell him, and he laughs at you, shaking his head. “I’m sure you would have, but you’re not going to get the chance. I never even got to know him well.”

“Don’t need to know him well.” You retort, and he quickly says, “Maybe you don’t. Anyway, he’s also not here anymore, and like you said, he’s better now. So chance gone.”

Thinking about watching brings a thought to your mind, and you laugh a little, saying to him, “Shame I hung up without checking who was calling. Could’ve let you watch me.” You tell him, and he shakes his head quickly, fake retching.

“Thank fuck you didn’t. I don’t want to see whatever you’re doing with those two.”

You listen to the whole sentence, but there’s only really one thing you can take away from that, and you smirk, asking quickly, “So if it’s not them?” He doesn’t give an answer and you grin, arm around his back and kissing him again, longer this time, eager.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Maybe that’ll make it worth it to go and try Koujaku. Or Clear. You bet Clear would be happy to see you. Showing off for Mizuki is always good, however you’re doing it.

“Getting distracted?” He asks, resting his forehead against yours for a second, teasing, “You know you could at least focus on me whilst you’re here. I can’t be that boring.”

“How about you show me something interesting then?"


	10. Fucking (again)

He reacts to that about as you expect, raising a brow at you and then pulling you into a rough kiss.   
Good. Talking and taunting is fun and all, but it’s much better to have him kissing you, and you guess that’s kind of proving his point that you let him control so easily, but he’s just good at it. 

You wish you weren’t in the hospital, because even though you have no concerns about anyone coming in, there are just. Less opportunities here. He doesn’t have any of his toys here, or really anything, and that means he can’t do as much to you.   
You’ll go see him once he’s out of hospital though, it doesn’t matter if you get less than you want right now, as long as you get him.

“That what you wanted?” He asks, and you shrug a little. “I could definitely go for more.”  
“Of course you could.” He says with a bit of a laugh, asking quickly, “Safeword?” 

“Peaches.” Same as always. You won’t be needing it, but he always likes to make sure you remember it, and for once you guess that’s actually pretty fair. When it’s only been a day or two it’s stupid, but given it’s been years you’ll accept that.

“Good boy.” He tells you, and he props himself up on his elbow, telling you quickly, “Now sit up.”

“This is dumb.” You say, but you sit up anyway. “How much can we even do here? You don’t even have lube.”

He reaches under the pillow you’ve just got off of and pulls out lube, grinning at you.

“Okay so you do. Why?” It’s great that he does, but you don’t know who could’ve brought him it. The thought of Koujaku or even Aoba, bright fucking red, bringing Mizuki some lube, is honestly kind of hilarious.

“Kyo brought me a little care package with this hidden at the bottom.” He grinned.

“Didn’t know you two were like that.” You know Kyo. But you didn’t think they were ever fucking.

“Are you jealous?” You shake your head quickly. You absolutely aren’t jealous. You don’t care who he sleeps with. You just. Didn’t think he was with him like that. You’re just surprised. And maybe a little jealous.

“I can’t believe you’re actually jealous!” He says again, sitting up next to you and acting like it’s the most hilarious thing in the world.

He shakes his head a little after a second, kissing you gently. “It was only a couple of times, a couple of years back. He’s just a good friend. Realised I might want it.”

You nod a little at him. Fair enough. And at least it’s going to make your life easier. You kiss him again, slightly rougher now, and when he pulls away he quickly tells you, “Okay, shirt off.”

You pull your shirt off quickly, and you’re just about to throw it on the ground when he grabs it, pulling it from you, “Hands above your head.”

You put your arms up, crossed at the wrist, and watch as he spins the shirt round quickly, basically removing the body of it and just keeping the length, quickly lifting it to your arms and starting to wrap it around.

It’s a lot shorter than any rope he’d usually use, and even with that you don’t know how he does the knots. He’s just as quick as always though, telling you when to grip. He doesn’t need the help, it’ll be steady anyway, but he likes to give you something to hold onto.

“Pull.” He tells you once he’s done, and you give it a quick tug, trying to get your hands apart. “Good?”

“Slightly tight. Not painful though.” He hates when you aren’t honest with him, always insists you’re going to just get yourself hurt, so you let him know, and he nods a little.

“Tell me if it gets any worse.” He says, and you nod quickly. You’re glad he’s not undoing it, because you don’t think he’d be able to get it perfect anyway. You assume he’s decided the same thing. 

He takes a deep breath, watching you, and you think he’s trying to push himself. You wonder if he’s done anything like this with anyone recently. You wonder if he’s done it since you.

He kisses you again, pushing you down into the bed, straddling you, hand gripping where your wrists join, pinning you down by them.

“So…” He muses, kissing down your neck ever so gently, down to your shoulders, teasing at all the marks already there. “Do these hurt?” He asks, and you can’t really shrug, so instead you just answer, “A little.”

He sucks almost directly over a mark that’s already there, “Fuck.. okay, more than a little.” You tell him, and he nips the skin before pulling away. 

“But you love it don’t you?” He teases, nipping again, “And you’re so desperate. Needed to get fucked so badly that you couldn’t even wait for me to wake up.”

You want to touch him, or for him to touch you more, but he’s sticking with just kissing at your neck for now, keeping talking, such a fucking tease.

“What’s it been? Maybe a couple of hours? And you already want more?” He says, stroking over the marks on the other side of your neck.

“Are you going to beg?” He asks, and he laughs a little at his own rhetorical question, putting a finger over your lips to stop you from trying to answer. “You will. How long are you going to make yourself wait first though?”

He sounds so fucking confident. So sure of himself. You’re not giving him that satisfaction.   
“I’ve been fucked more recently than you have, think you need it more.” He bites you when you say that, and you try to shift your arms, wanting to wrap them around him, but he’s still got them pinned, and he quickly says back, “I’m sure I could wait months and you’d still need it more.” 

Maybe he’s right about that, but this isn’t any sort of proof. With him touching you, and you not even able to do anything to him, of course you’re going to end up more desperate.

“I hate you.” You tell him, and he grins, gently nudging the knot around your wrists, “You want me to undo this then? Let you go?”

“Obviously not.” What a stupid question. He laughs at you, kissing you again, softly this time. “Thought so. So stop your whining.”

“Now.. These.” He says, pressing at the marks on your neck, smiling sweetly, even when you wince slightly.   
“Why do you love them so much?” He asks, and you both talked about this earlier, but he’s much more teasing now. “Do you just love how they feel? Or do you want everyone to see?” He doesn’t give you a chance to answer, but he knows you like them being seen.

“Why do you like them seeing? Do you want them to know what a slut you are? Just by looking at you, can see exactly what you want? What you’ve been doing?” He speaks so lovingly, even though he’s saying things that most people would definitely consider negative. You know that he doesn’t, and he knows that you don’t, he’s just saying things how they are.

“You love to see them too.” You tell him, and he nods a little, gently kissing down your shoulder again.  
“They’re not for me though. They’re for everyone to see. You do love to make people stare,  
don’t you?” He’s right there. You don’t care whether someone is staring because they’ve heard you’re awesome at sucking dick or if it’s because they’ve heard about your Rhyme, but you do like to know they’re watching you.

He sees the little smirk on your face, and quickly says, “Exactly. So desperate for attention.” He teases, nipping at a mark and then sucking hard on it again.

“Pretty little slut..” He muses, and you can’t help actually letting out a little moan this time as he gropes you through your pants. He’s such a fucking tease. He won’t even let you touch him, not even just to wrap your arms around his neck.

You turn your head to try to kiss him, but he doesn’t let you, instead just smiling brightly, and kissing down your shoulder again. He’s so fucking pretty. He looks so happy.

“Kiss me.” You tell him, and he laughs a little, before kissing you for just a second, not any more than a peck, or giving you any chance to try to kiss back.

“Asshole.” You say, and he laughs a little, saying quietly, “Well. That doesn’t quite sound like begging.”  
You won’t beg him. Even if you want him to stop being such a fucking tease, and you really want to be able to kiss him and hold him and see him get that stupid fucking gown off, you aren’t going to beg for it.

You think he’s realising that he can’t both talk to you and have his mouth on you like he wants to, which sucks, because you wish he was touching you more. Instead of his mouth, he just moves his hand up your torso, gently pinching a nipple when he reaches it.

One hand on yours, his mouth sticking with your shoulders and neck, and one hand free to do what it wants. It’s really not enough, and that’s his point, you’re pretty sure.

“Nobody comes in here.” He tells you, “Now that I’m basically better, nobody barges in apart from Reason and Koujaku.”

“Think Koujaku will come in? Think he’d want to watch?” You ask, with a small laugh at the thought, and he shakes his head quickly, chuckling a little too, “He’d have a heart attack if he saw this. If he saw how fucking needy you look. And how you choose me over him.”

You try to kiss him again, and he lets you this time, kissing back for a minute, and you’re the one to pull back this time “Pretty sure my entire existence would completely break his brain.”

He nods a little, and then finally lets go of your hands, telling you immediately, “Keep them there.”

“If I don’t?” You ask, as he kisses slowly down your chest, not leaving any marks now, just completely gentle as he goes down, “I’ll stop.”

He won’t. He wants this as much as you, he won’t just stop. But you keep your arms up anyway, not feeling like testing him. You’ll shift them later.

He kisses down your stomach, more free to do what he wants now, and undoes your pants when he reaches them, pulling them down your hips with a bit of difficulty, despite how you’re trying to help make it easier.

He gets them off though, and then sucks a small mark at your hip, just above the top of your boxers. 

He kisses along the line, and then decides to go down, mouthing at you through your boxers, very slow and careful. He’s such a tease. 

He gently presses fingers into your thighs, and he actually has nails, which he gently scratches along the inside. He probably won’t actually mark you, not too much, but you don’t care, because at least it feels good.

“Aoba..” He says quietly, and then licks a line up, straight over your dick, and you try to press your hips up, wishing he’d take your boxers off, “So needy. And so pretty.” 

He finally pulls your boxers off, and he’s staring up at you about as much as you’re staring at him, and he suddenly starts to completely ignore your dick, instead moving his lips to just below, sucking surprisingly harshly at the inside of your thighs. You don’t have any marks there yet, but that definitely will, and you’re glad. 

“Come on…” You tell him, and he grins, looking up at you, and you think he’s trying to look innocent, but he just has the least innocent face you have ever seen in your life, “Hm? What do you want?”

“Anything.” You tell him. You really really don’t care. Anything he’ll give you. Anything that’s more than the way he just keeps nipping at your thigh, kissing gently and then asking, “No please? And nothing more specific?”

“No.” He laughs a little at you, and shifts back up to kiss you again, rough and biting, a lot more needy himself now too. “Sure? Because I can wait.”

You hate him. You don’t want to tell him, so instead you just say, “Get that stupid gown off. Let me see you. And touch you.”

“Really? You’re going to be that soft Sly?” He teases, and he’s right that nobody else would expect that from you, from the Sly Blue that you show, but he knows that he’s different.   
He doesn’t go to undo your hands, but he pulls off the gown, leaving himself naked. He looks almost exactly like normal, and it makes you more aware of how weird it is that his neck is still bandaged. He can’t still be injured there, you know that. He’s just hiding. 

He’s hard too, and maybe if you weren’t being a brat he’d actually touch you now, stroke both of you together, but instead he kisses you again, and then nips at the shell of your ear, “Again. What do you want?” 

“Anything.” You tell him again, and you shift your arms to try and loop them round him, but he reacts too quick, grabbing them and pinning them down again, “Fuck me, ride me, let me up and let me ride you, anything.”

He laughs, shaking his head a little and saying quickly, “Close… I think you’re missing something though.”

You don’t answer, and he kisses your neck again, teasingly light and gentle, barely even touching you, “Come on Aoba…” 

“Please…” You ask quietly, and he rewards you with a small nip, asking quickly, “What was that? A bit quiet.”

You shake your head and he bites harder, sucking another mark into your neck, and you say quickly, “Fine… Please, more.”

“There we go… Not that hard is it?” He asks, and he kisses you again, finally reaching between you both and stroking you together.

You kiss back needily, and try to push your arms up, wanting to loop around his shoulders, but he still has them pinned, and he laughs a little into the kiss, “Really? You’re going to make me fall if you keep being like this.”   
After kissing you for a little longer he sits up, and you want to follow him up, but he stares at you and you stay down, just watching him, and he grins. “Good. Now. You still haven’t told me what you want.”

You try to shrug a little, and tell him again, “Told you, anything.” You always like anything he does with you, so you really don’t care.

He hums, and then grabs the lube again, squirting some onto his fingers, and then reaching back behind himself. You can’t really watch, not well, but you focus on his face, because he looks so cute.

He looks a little less confident for a minute, and says after a second, “You’re staring..”  
“You’re pretty.” You tell him, and he goes a bit red at that, saying quickly, “So sweet.”

“Not sweet.” You argue, and you sit up, him actually letting you this time, or more just unable to stop you, looping your arms around him, kissing him softly, “You’re just cute like this.”

After a minute more of kissing you he lets out a soft moan, probably adding another finger, and then breaks away to bite at your neck again.  
He spends a minute like that, pretty rough as he nips at you, and letting out soft moans against your neck as he fingers himself. You can’t watch his face anymore, but you can hear him, and you can’t help the small noise you let out when he rocks his hips against yours and bites down hard.

“Lay back again.” He tells you, pushing gently at your shoulder with his free hand, and you unhook your arms and go back easily, grinning up at him. He’s so red now, and you wonder if you look at all similar. You don’t think you look quite as cute as he does, even when you’re bottoming. 

He takes his fingers from himself, and gets a little extra lube on his hand before stroking you, his thumb brushing over your tip and getting pre from it. He only bothers to stroke you a couple of times before leading you to his entrance, slowly lowering himself onto you. He’s so fucking warm, and he sounds so fucking good as he moans out.

“Fuck…” He says quietly, slowly lifting himself back up before lowering himself again, “Aoba…” He holds your hips still, so you can’t move at all yet, and when he finally manages to fully take you he tells you, “Just.. give me a second.”

He must think you’re over-eager, which admittedly, you kind of are. You aren’t stupid though, and you know you should let him set his own pace to begin with, so you just nod, wishing you could at least rest your hands on his hips. 

You want to be able to touch him, he’s so pretty, and he feels so good around you, even better when he finally actually moves, letting out a soft moan when he does. 

You can’t help moaning too, as he moves himself, rolling his hips slightly and then letting himself shift to lay over you. It means he can’t lift himself as fully, but he can kiss you, and you’re glad for that. You honestly care about that a fair bit more than just how much he can move, because he’s still moving enough, it’s still so fucking good to be in him.   
He kisses you so needily, finally letting you wrap your arms around him again, and you can’t really hold his back like you want to, but you’re keeping him close at least. He wouldn’t move away anyway, you don’t think, but it’s nice to be holding him.

He surprises you with how well he can still move, lifting his hips and lowering them still, slow to begin, and then picking up the pace after a minute. 

However injured he was before, he’s clearly not now, and he’s got his fucking stamina too, keeping moving completely confidently. Sure he’s kissing you instead of talking now, but you’re pretty sure that given the chance, you wouldn’t do a great job with many words right now anyway.

Both of you are pretty desperate in your kissing, you nipping at him eagerly, finally starting to rock your hips up into him. It’s so natural for you both to move together, and after a while he decides to sit back up, so you can’t kiss him any more but you can see how absolutely beautiful he looks when he wraps a hand around himself, stroking in time with how he moves his hips. 

He’s louder now, and you’re sure you must be too, with how he’s moving more, looking at you so desperately. He doesn’t seem concerned about being heard, and he’s very definitely the more reasonable of the pair of you, so you don’t have any concerns either.

“Close..” He tells you, speeding up, and you nod a little, trying to thrust up into him more. 

It’s only a minute more before he’s tightening around you, spilling over his own stomach, and the sight and feeling of that is enough for you to finish too.  



	11. Fine

He pulls off you after a minute, laying next to you and breathing heavily, and you laugh a little, rolling onto your side so you can try to kiss him, but unable to with how your arms are trapped.

“Hey..” You say quietly, shifting your arms slightly to get his attention, and he quickly nods, reaching up to undo them, fumbling a little. You laugh a little at the thought of him not being able to get it at all, but he manages after a second.

The first thing you do is wrap your arms around him, holding onto him for a second, and then, after a second you ask, “Have you got tissues too?”   
He nods, pointing to your side and saying quickly, “That drawer.”  
You reach into it, pulling out a couple of tissues and wiping off his stomach. He gets a lot more bothered by feeling dirty than you do, and you want him to be able to just relax with you.

The two of you lay there for a few minutes, not bothering to talk, just relaxing together. After a short while you kiss him on the cheek, and then he turns to face you so that you can kiss him properly again.  
It’s not as needy anymore, but you still kiss him deeply, happy to have him close, and just to be able to spend time with him again.

When you pull away you lift your hand to his neck, gently running your fingers over the bandage there, and he looks almost scared.   
“Don’t.” He tells you softly, and you don’t try to undo them yourself, instead just kissing him very briefly again instead, and saying quietly, “Show me.”

He knows that he doesn’t actually have to. Not if he doesn’t want to. You say it like it’s an instruction, but he has the confidence to tell you to just fuck off if he needs to.  
He doesn’t tell you to fuck off, but he does tell you quickly, “I’ve not shown anyone. Since I came in here at least.” 

He’s not happy with how he showed it off before he was here, you can see that. But you don’t want him to show it off and feel proud of it, you just want to see.  
“I’m not anyone.” You say, simply. “Show me.” 

He sighs, and for a second you think he’s going to say something, but instead he just reaches up to his neck, gently undoing it. It’s not knotted, you find out, it’s just a safety pin he’s used to keep it in place. You think that might be for the best, keep it from becoming too tight.  
He hands you the pin, and as he unwraps the bandage he manages to actually think of what to say, “You can’t. Tell anyone.”

You’re not sure what that means, but you nod. If he’s only sharing something with you then you want to stay as the only person who knows it.

You understand when he unwraps the bandage though, because you get a good look, at not only the tattoo, which you already were vaguely aware of how it looked, but also at how it’s damaged.   
You were so sure he couldn’t possibly be injured anymore, and this is clearly it’s something he’s done to himself.

You don’t ask why though, you just look for a minute, at the marks. A couple are thin lines that may have actually bled, you’re not quite sure how he managed them, but you can see more that are simply very thick red lines, must be recent, you know marks like that don’t stick around too long.

You kiss him again, and then kiss his neck, feather light, avoiding the lines where the skin is actually split. You don’t want to hurt him, you just want to kiss him, show him just how important he is. He’s so beautiful, even with this on his neck. 

“Does the bandage help stop you from scratching?” You ask, kissing gently across it, and then down to his shoulders, where you actually nip ever so slightly, not worrying over hurting him there.

“Not as much as I’d like.” He answers, gently stroking over your back, and when you hum a little he continues, “It has to be loose so I don’t choke myself, but then when I have nightmares it pushes out of the way far too easily.”

You frown a little, because you don’t think you can help here, you can’t fix that for him. You want to be able to just fix everything for him.

That’s what scrap is for. But you can’t just scrap him. You don’t know what actually happens when you scrap someone twice. You also don’t actually know for definite that you could scrap someone without destroying them. You’re not planning on testing either of these things on him.

“You don’t remember who did it, do you?” You ask, and he shakes his head. You know he can’t remember a lot about being in morphine. You wonder if it’s just been forced down, or if scrap knocked it out of him.

“I’ll kill them.” You tell him, and he nods a little, laughing darkly, “If I ever remember then good luck getting there first.”

You frown a little, it’s not like him to be so negative, it’s much more your thing, and it just sounds wrong from Mizuki. You aren’t going to tell him not to though, you’re just glad that immediate reaction is hidden against his shoulder.

“Well..” You say, shifting so you can kiss him again, “At least call me first.”  
“And if it’s not you?” He asks, and you know you can’t stop him. You can’t ask him to wait either, he wouldn’t, you wouldn’t expect him to.

“Be careful.” You say, and he laughs at that, bright and cheery again, saying quickly, “Wow. Really know I’m suggesting something stupid when you’re the one telling me to be careful.”

You don’t think it’s stupid. Just. Dangerous. Maybe dangerous and stupid are pretty much the same. That’d make a lot of stuff you’ve done before stupid. And it probably wouldn’t be wrong.   
You just think if they’ve hurt him before then they’ll hurt him again. And there’s no reason in your mind to believe whoever it is would be any less capable now. 

He’s always been the one worrying over things, and now you have to worry about him. Well. You don’t really have to, but of course you’re fucking going to. You can’t help worrying about him.

Maybe he’ll never remember anyway. You hope he will though. Even though it’s stupid, and going to be dangerous, you really hope that he remembers and that it’s when you’re there to deal with them with him. 

“It’s not stupid. It’s what they fucking deserve. I just don’t want you to do it alone.” You tell him, and you kiss him again, slightly roughly, just working out frustration. You’re not frustrated with him, not really, although making out with him when you’re mad at each other is also generally quite good. For now you’re just mad at.. everything. Again.   
And he seems to understand that well enough, kissing you back for a minute, holding you tightly and digging his nails into your back, giving you something to focus on.

When he pulls back he rests his forehead on yours, staring in your eyes, and says, quite seriously, “Look. I’m fine. Sly. Aoba.” It’s that exasperated tone and just how he talks to you, just natural. “I’m fine. I’m stronger than the shit they put me through.”

He doesn’t believe that. You might not pay attention when he talks to Reason, but you only need to look at him to know he doesn’t fucking believe that.   
“Don’t lie to me.” You say, staring at him, and adding after a second, “You’re not fine. And you don’t believe you’re fucking strong.”

He doesn’t get angry like you expect him to, he doesn’t try to insist he’s fine, he just closes his eyes, sighs, and asks, “So what do you want then?”

“Believe it.” You tell him, not even pausing to think, and you know that he can’t just decide to, but if he wants to know what you want then that’s the only answer you can come up with.

He shakes his head a little, just kissing you softly again, “I’ll be fine.” 

You sigh, shifting to rest closer with him, putting your head on his chest and closing your eyes again. He pets through your head, just stroking over your hair gently, because you’ve asked him to be careful before, although you told him it was just because he accidentally catches knots. 

Maybe you’ll explain that properly at some point. You can’t remember now quite why you didn’t. You’d told him weird shit before. Maybe sometimes he hadn’t believed it, but you’d told him.  
Maybe it had been that he was so different, and treated you like a real person, and you suppose you hadn’t wanted to scare him away. And then by the time you knew you couldn’t scare him off, you’d already told him that.

He kisses the top of your head, and it’s so fucking gentle, so caring. He’s just.. so nice. “I missed you.” He tells you, and it means a lot more than when he was so teasing earlier, and so so much more than when Virus agreed that he’d missed you.

“I missed you too.” You tell him quietly, and you feel his breath on your head as he chuckles a little, kissing you again. 

“Are you going to stay around a while then? Or do you desperately need to rush off to go get fucked again?” He teases, still stroking at your head. You just shrug a little. 

You don’t want to just flat out tell him that you want to stay. Even though you really do, he’s already clearly teasing you for being so soft on him, so you don’t want to tell him.  
So you tell him something else, which is also pretty true, “Don’t know who I’d even go for.”

You’d wanted to see him. And Virus and Trip were an obvious choice. They weren’t going to question you, you didn’t have to explain yourself for a second. They accepted you as you were. Mizuki hadn’t needed much, and you’d wanted him to know anyway.  
His team? They’d be confused as hell. There are a fair few of them you’ve been with before, but even if they’re still in the team, they weren’t the type of guys to just go with things. Not that easily.   
Noiz is gone, you think Mink is too. Clear is… If you want someone that fucking sweet you’ll just stick with Mizuki, thanks very much. It really only leaves Koujaku. Or going out fishing for randoms. 

Searching for randoms just doesn’t appeal to you. It’s only ever ended seriously badly one or two times, but you don’t know how your scrap is going to treat you today. And you aren’t really looking to get beaten to a pulp right now.

He just keeps holding you close whilst you think, and you stay quiet a minute longer even after you’ve thought through everything, because you’re just enjoying being close with him. It’s nice to just relax, just be with him again.  
You don’t really want to ruin it with your stupid answer, so you don’t. You just stay there, eyes closed, resting with Mizuki.

You’re nearly falling asleep when he shifts suddenly, and you’re pretty surprised, mainly just because you hadn’t realised you were quite that tired. Looks like your stamina isn’t as great anymore.

“I need to rewrap my neck..” He says, like it’s urgent, even though he’s just thought of it. You nod a little, reaching to grab the bandages and pin, but you just give them to him and don’t try to help, not trusting yourself to do it right. You wouldn’t be any help anyway, you’re still tired, and he’s so confident with it, knowing exactly how tight he wants them.

For a second you think it’s kind of funny, how he wants to hide the tattoo, but he doesn’t care at all about sleeping here naked with you.

And then you have to actually watch as he hurriedly wraps it round, pins it, feels desperately to check that it’s fine, that it’s fully covering his neck, looking genuinely worried, and you decide it’s definitely just sad.

“You’re fine.” You tell him tiredly, kissing him softly, “It’s hidden. You’re all good.”   
He nods a little, relaxing back onto the bed, and you quickly shift back to where you were. You still want to relax, and you know that just being laid like this is the best way to help him relax again. 

You worry slightly that if you fall asleep now, it might be Reason that wakes up. Normally the idea of anything that’d horrify him this much thrills you, but right now it really doesn’t. You want to be able to keep spending time with Mizuki, but you also want to be able to just sleep like this. You hope you get to wake up with him with you. 

You have to push the worry aside, and his hand on your head helps with that, helps you just let yourself slip into complete calm again. It’s harder to sleep now that you feel more aware of it, and you know that’s normal, but it’s still so fucking dumb.

Even with the worry of if you’ll get to wake up with him, and your brain seeming to want to actively resist sleep purely to spite you, you finally end up relaxing completely again after a while, dozing off with your arm wrapped over him.


End file.
